I guess in a way it is much easier to stay cranky and closed up, allowing the mind to repeat its power-taking thoughts and marinate in the passivity, negativity of old patterns. Habits don’t take a lot of effort, the „program“ is well rehearsed, it plays itself out easily, oftentimes it crawls up on you, it hides in the best possible place – right in front of your eyes.
But to come out of this prison, to change the perspective, to break the pattern – this takes repeated action, it takes responsibility. This old, forced, absorbed and inevitably well-rehearsed patterns that got stuck in our minds, perhaps since the times, we had no control or awareness of what „truths“ we are being fed, are getting tighter and smaller with time. But still, this limiting believes are so familiar I sometimes can’t help myself but allowing them to take my freedom. So now, when I have wider awareness, when I do have a choice, when I have the possibility of looking at the power-taking thoughts from another perspective, I can start to destabilize the patterns by questioning them, looking straight at them with a clearer vision from the perspective of an uninvolved witness.
It is a mental pushup that I try to practice everytime I feel, sense, notice I am falling into my old outgrown ways and oh, how many times I still fall into their trap. But like everything else, with practice, I am getting more skilfull in destabilizing the old patterns by reinforcing my own core content that brings balance in my life.
It is not that I somewhere read that it is good to be positive, strong, open and kind and now I am trying to squeeze myself into this mold, no!
It is about the fact, that I am, for more vibrant, light, juicy, sweet, creative, loving, joyful when I am free from the old, sticky, overly critical, heavy patterns that are keeping me small and are not even mine, they never were.
And knowing that, having that experience, I see no reason why I would not do EVERYTHING that is in my power, to work towards deconstruction of power-taking thoughts and to stay in the state of loving bliss as often as possible, because it enriches my life, the life of my loved ones, my practitioners, everybody I work with and everybody that crosses my path. It is a duty and an urgency I am starting to feel deep in within my core, it is my contribution to the world, to stay soft and aware of the fact I co-create the energy of every space I enter and I affect the world around me. I believe it is a very selfish way to be stuck in old patterns that take away your power or make you cold, closed up, bitter, angry, overly critical and dry inside.
If I am alive and healthy, my loved ones are alive and healthy I already have too much (not just more than enough) reasons to be in lightness, gratitude, freedom, joy. I can be so spoiled, so attached to »my ways« that I take everything for granted. What a shame. Cognition is construction, not registration (Ornstein 1973), so why would I not choose another perspective, one that is more aligned with my own deepest values, one that reflects how I want to co-create the world.
After 15 years of asana practice, I have a clear and very direct experience of the power of thoughts. Thoughts create, trigger emotions and affect my flavors and also vice versa.
I am very much aware of my own power and responsibility of restoring balance through clear, strong, determined investigation of power-taking thoughts and melting them into the sweet softness, into my ocean of love.
So when I get all sour, bitter, cold and dry I ask myself what I did today for staying in my sweetness? And then I sit on my math, clear my mind and restore balance with a little help from my lovers: Nadhi Shodhana, intuitive movement, finish it up with a loving warm oil self-massage and instantly everything starts to look brighter, the world changes as I change my inner qualities.
Ohh The Power, Ohh The Beautiness of Simple Life.
This is my Holy Practice, here is where I Am.
Autor : Sanja Zalar Gostimirović